Nathan Wade Carter

Knot or Very


I was given

a shitty watercolor palette

and I had to make art with it

there are ways to make beautiful things

with ugly ingredients

I remember this

as my paper roll unfolds

longing & softening

the unreached middle

the end of the roll

I’ve written this before

this autobiography

currently very red

         and layered

like hell & whatever else

I was burned & covered up

I am more myself empty

I return to this leaving

      this right of mine

      to push into earth

      like trickles turn

      into grand grooved canyons

      & deltas shit

      into the sea

      it meets me

      and whatever

      I am & will become

      hollow present

      wooden knot

      in which the sun rests


NATHAN WADE CARTER is a queer, grey-a poet, musician, and artist living in Portland, Oregon. He is author of the chapbook ROYGBIV (Ursus Americanus Press 2017). His poetry can be found in Hobart, Heavy Feather Review, Horse Less Press, Poor Claudia, Powder Keg Magazine, The Fem, and others. He is editor and founder of SUSAN / The Journal. He writes and performs songs under the name Purrbot. He is recording a new album called DNR. Find him online at